These days we’ve been having a collective reflection with Stephen, Andrew, Kimball and Christian. They were thinking about their reasons to be in the Henley MBA program. I realised we had a nice thread going here, so I couldn’t help adding my own.
I’ve thought of why an MBA several times, but the first one I have recorded is the one that I wrote when I was filling in the application on the 23rd of April last year. I had everything: referee’s letters, an updated resume, my academic qualifications translated… but I still needed the why. And before writing it into the application I wrote it to myself.
Reading it now gives me a funny feeling. It hasn’t been a full year but it sounds like if it was from another person. I was really trying to convince myself that I wasn’t doing it for the sake of having the three must-have magical letters. In my writings I read somebody far more worried for the future than I am now, somebody awaiting the unexpected and at the same time trying to give a false sense of security.
But now I feel the past months have changed me. They made me think, reflect and grow. I have created an additional place for Henley in my life (and Henley means its people) and I’m quite fond of it. I feel an emotional attachment that makes me think that, after those sensible but cold words I wrote about change, focus, roles, support, perspectives, aptitudes and abilities there were far more psychological needs.
Don’t ask me to detail them, not yet. I still can’t. I know it’s something about experimenting, feeling and growing.
I studied engineering and economy before, but they always looked outwards, not inwards. I shaped external objects or analysed external realities. It was me getting closer to some facts and data, understanding and applying, but there were no reflections in me. Now I’m not worried about developing analytical abilities any more. Now I am part of what I learn. Somehow, I experiment and shape myself, the subject and the object collide and fuse. Even now, writing these words.
I don’t want to bore you with my mental ramblings. It’s only that the whys and wherefores have melded and the goals are no longer that important. The way is rewarding enough. Let’s go on…